Let me start off by saying I love the life I have, and I am thankful and blessed every single day for it. I have the luxury of watching my kids grow up, seeing all the milestones, teaching them new things. This is just a peek into one stay-at-home-mom’s inside world, and I’m sure you can relate.
Most days we are out and about doing one thing or another. So hardly am I a “stay” at-home-mom. But when we are at home, I am usually cooking something that I don’t want to eat, cleaning up a mess that I didn’t make, or changing someone’s clothes after I’ve thrown on my “nice” leggings. My personal favorite is taking someone to the bathroom when I can’t even pee without being called for thirty times. This is all while keeping the house from looking like an H-bomb dropped on it, avoiding someone severely injuring themselves, and trying to plan something for dinner besides cereal and potato chips.
Once the kids actually take a nap, I work part-time on my computer in addition to trying to get a business off the ground, and maybe I can throw in some laundry folding or dish washing if I’m lucky. In some moments of weakness, I might get a bowl of ice cream and watch an episode of Dr. Phil. I look forward to nap time, because even though I usually spend it doing something for someone else, it’s still just me. It’s quiet. I can think (somewhat) clearly. When the kids are awake, all bets are off.
I can’t finish a cup of coffee with breakfast. A lot of times I will be making something for dinner and find my mug in the microwave that I had intended to warm and keep drinking. Never happens. So I will probably treat myself to Starbucks whenever we leave the house. You know, that’s the best time to drink a coffee, when you’re in the car and your kids are strapped down.
I can’t talk on the phone when the kids are awake. Something about that phone to my ear sends them straight into a psychotic break. If you call me, I will probably look at my phone and purposefully ignore the call. I won’t be able to hear what you are saying anyway. In fact, I hardly have any verbal communication with the outside world. Most days, when my husband gets home from work will be the first time I’ve spoken to another adult all day.
I can’t shop for clothes for myself. If I do, it involves haphazardly grabbing things off the clearance rack at Target while I’m there for applesauce and cold medicine. There will absolutely be no trying things on until I get home and the kids are in bed, at which time I realize I definitely needed the next size up and then I am too depressed to go clothes shopping for another 3 months. I will just return it and buy something for the kids instead.
A lot of these things I can’t do for myself because, well, they are for me. As moms we get so wrapped up in doing and being everything for everyone else that we lose ourselves in the process. I should feel guilty that it’s 3:00 pm and I haven’t had a single glass of water yet, that I haven't worked out in the past 2 years, or that I haven’t taken a moment to just breathe and recollect the fragments of my brain that are scattered on the floor among the Legos and Hot Wheels.
Listen to me moms: do something YOU want to do for once. Everything will still be where you left it when you get done. Let's be honest, nothing gets done without you anyway. So, lose all the guilt. It’s heavy and weighing you down. Take a minute to enjoy your life and it will reflect in everything else that you do.